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La nutella
Once upon a time, many many many, ma'na cifra of many years ago, at the beginning of the initiation of the mond, there was the caos.
One day, God-Allah (God-Allah is the name d'art of Dio), God, who was disoccupated, had a folgorant idea and so God created the Nutell. And God-Allah saw that the Nutell was good, very good, very very good, good'na cifra.
The mangiation of God was long. he manged one million of barattols of Nuttell sfrutting the fact that God has not a Mamm that strills if you sbaf too much Nutell... And after this mangiation, God invented the Water Closed Run, the cors in the cabinet, and some Nutell's derivates like the red bubbons, the panz, the cellulit and ceter and ceter.
After di which (dopodiche') he invented Adamo ed Eva and all the Paradise and he disse to Adamo and Eva: "Now you have all the Paradise, you can do
everything, very tutt: you have the permission to eat, to drink, to kiss, to scop; nothing lavor, nothing afitt, nothing concors of impiegats, nothing cod alla post, nothing IPREF, ILOR. Only very ozious life: television, telenovels, football, moviols, process of Monday, appell of Tuesday, cassazion of Wednsday, and ceter and ceter. You have gratis restaurants, autonom riscaldament, moquette, parquet, tresset, bidet, omelette, eccet eccet...
There's just one thing remember, in tutt the Paradise just one thing is absolutely prohibited. Come, come to me in the giardin, look at this alber: this is the Nocciol, the alber of the Nutell. Only this alber of the Nutell is prohibited, because I like the Nutell very much, very very much, much'na cifra and I want all the nutell, tutt the Nutell for me."
During the prim temps, Adamo and Eva were very happy, Adam said: "What a
cool!" ('Cool is not in italian 'freddo', no 'What a cool' means 'Che cul') all the Paradise is nostr!. And everyday, ognigiorn, they discoverd something new. a lot of scoperts, many scoperts, many many scoperts, 'na cifra 'e scoperts; one day the scopert of the hot water, one day the scopert of the spaghettis, one day the cigarettes, and ceter and ceter.
But one sad day, a trist day, very very trist, trist'na cifra,Adamo and Eva fecer the scopert of the first colazion. And after the scopert of the cappuccin, the scopert of the aranch succ, the scopert of the cornetts, they understood that something was mancant.
-"Eva!" said Adam "Don't you thing that qualcos is mancament here, proprio here,'ncopp a this fett?" -"Second me" Eva risposed "'ncopp the fett you have
to metter burr and marmelade" -"No, no Eva, you know that the marmelade schif myself, I want 'ncopp a' this fett something very particular, very very particular, particular 'na cifra: ... What do you think about the Nutell?"
-"No, Adam you are scording that Signor said that's vietat!"
-"Yes, I remember, but only a little assaggiation, don't succed nothing!"
And Adam sces in the cortil where the alber oh the Nutell was and he pres a small barattol and spalmed the brown cream on the fett and assagged the Nutell Adam and Eva don't ebber the time to exprimer the godiment that the tuons and fulmins apparved in the ciel and one voice said:"Potevamo stupir you with special effects but I'm God, not fantagod! Adam, Eva comehere!! I'm very incaz with you,very very incaz, incaz'na cifra!! How did you permit to tocc the Nutell? Didn't you remember that it was prohibited?"
... How did you permit to tocc the Nutell? Didn't you remember that it was prohibited?" ... prohibited ... prohibited ...(eco ...)
"Cazz!" esclamed Adam "it was prohibited! Oh,sorry, God, I'm very very sorry, sorry'na cifra, God, I really really was completely scordat..."
"Don't do the fint tont, Adam, I'm God, I can see everything, very tutt, and I know that you and the woman have deliberatament assaggiated the Nutell. So you have a big punhition, a very castig for your peccat.
But siccom I'm sconfinatly good,you can choose, you have two scelts:
Scelt number 1: nothing Nutella for ever and ever in the secols of thesecols amen".
-"Noo !" Eva was piagnucoling "it's a thing very tragic,veryvery tragic, tragic 'na cifra!" -"Aspet !" said God "don't be frettolous, woman..."
Scelt number 2: you can take the Nutell, no problem, let's prend, prend, but for you is the cacciation out of the Paradise, you willsoffer, youwill have to lavorar with the sudor of your front, you will zapp the terr, you'll have mal of schien and, like this don't bastass, everytime you will mang Nutell, the malediction of the brufols, of the mal of panch, of the cacarel will be cadent on you."
-"Ale'!" asclaimed Adam "thank you God, thank you, we don't interess the cacciation dal Paradise, the important is to have the Nutell!! Goodbye! Ciao,ciao!"
And so Adam and Eva were cacciated and this original peccat and this malediction cadded on lor and on lor discendents and on the discendes of the discendents. Infact, tutt'ogg, you can veder in the pubblicity all the ragazz that per aver one fett of pan and Nutell they scalan the mountains they stay in a tend al fredd and al gel and ceter and ceter.
But the final pensier of tutti noi is "It's meglio faticar and soffrir with the Nutell piuttost che the terrestr Paradise senz the Nutell".